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Are you trying to get away from the community?
[ there seems to be only a pause for thought. only a pause for remembering. (and he remembers the murky sound of his own body. the murky sound of familiar voices (yukimi's?). the emptiness of thought. coherency. and he could feel his body, cold. he could feel without feeling the rough trek to somewhere. somewhere. his legs giving out. his vision dotting. dotting. going. and it was a vicious feeling that spilled out. it was a violent feeling that spilled out. his voice gone, his vision gone - his hearing - ) ]
No.
[ yes. ]
No.
[ yes. ]
Edited 2012-08-11 22:43 (UTC)
You've got pretty good handwriting. [ That's obviously the issue at hand here. ]
[ ...
he doesn't want the compliment. he doesn't want to hear the compliment. he doesn't want anything. (doesn't want another thing he can't return. doesn't want another thing he cannot give in return. doesn't -- it's embarrassing.) embarrassing, and he finds the pen tip against paper. having not a single word to write. not wanting to write a single word. not wanting --
but, the point is there. it sits.
a silence. ]
he doesn't want the compliment. he doesn't want to hear the compliment. he doesn't want anything. (doesn't want another thing he can't return. doesn't want another thing he cannot give in return. doesn't -- it's embarrassing.) embarrassing, and he finds the pen tip against paper. having not a single word to write. not wanting to write a single word. not wanting --
but, the point is there. it sits.
a silence. ]
permavid, poor Yuri doesn't know how to do anything else
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second_star
2012-08-11 11:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[ No response...Maybe the guy was busy or something. Huh. He wasn't one to pry, but the whole post interested him. It looked a log of all the attempts to escape the community. Though if it was really that easy, Yuri would have just thrown this book in the river a long time ago. ]
Yeah, this place is not going anywhere. You don't like it?
Yeah, this place is not going anywhere. You don't like it?
[ yoite is nothing, but diligent. he has pages upon pages filled with numbers. strange instances. notes. once he recovered - stopped reeling. he had split his days between reaching his goals and reaching kairoushuu's.
time was precious. he'd make the most of trying to rid himself from it. ]
If it can't be rid of, it can be avoided.
[ the words come quickly in a neat hand, though there's a faint tremor. if observant. but the second part is slower. almost after a thoughtful pause: ]
... I don't want to talk to it.
[ that's an answer, right. ]
time was precious. he'd make the most of trying to rid himself from it. ]
If it can't be rid of, it can be avoided.
[ the words come quickly in a neat hand, though there's a faint tremor. if observant. but the second part is slower. almost after a thoughtful pause: ]
... I don't want to talk to it.
[ that's an answer, right. ]
Edited 2012-08-11 23:29 (UTC)
[ He wasn't going to force someone to talk if they didn't want to. It was his business after all. Must have been a side effect or something, the nosiness of the community was probably rubbing off onto him. ]
Alright, don't worry about it.
Kind of weird that it's this persistent to keep you. You use computers, don't you? Why not just stay away from them?
Alright, don't worry about it.
Kind of weird that it's this persistent to keep you. You use computers, don't you? Why not just stay away from them?
I am sorry that the community has been troubling you.
You do you know you can't run from any sort of demon, right? The community I think is more than happy to act as your personal demon if you want.
[ there's a small pause, almost. a small pause, and it shows in the steadily growing indentation of ink upon some page. almost as if --
but the words come, quickly and neatly. an illusion of solidity: ]
It's still annoying.
[ don't be kind to me. please. ]
Since escaping it won't work, I'll settle on making it quieter.
but the words come, quickly and neatly. an illusion of solidity: ]
It's still annoying.
[ don't be kind to me. please. ]
Since escaping it won't work, I'll settle on making it quieter.
[she could go back through the old posts and check, but... no, skimming through all the virus videos is something Shooter would rather not do, as accustomed as she is to violence and death.
still, she says] I'm sorry.
[witnessing them is nearly just as bad, isn't it?]
still, she says] I'm sorry.
[witnessing them is nearly just as bad, isn't it?]
Huh. [ Well, that did tell him a little more. ]
You're pretty organized, if you've been keeping a log of this stuff. I could learn a thing or two from this.
You're pretty organized, if you've been keeping a log of this stuff. I could learn a thing or two from this.
[ he had the small mercy of not being shown. displayed. he had the smaller mercy of not being exposed. and still -- it wasn't much. it wouldn't be much. it wouldn't -- and something in him jerks. something in him starts to reel into some deeper well of hurt or anger or something in the realm of words without words. and the apology almost burns. almost burns clear to some other side. something he doesn't want touched. something that -- sympathy? pity?
it comes in a sharp scrawl: ]
Don't.
[ i don't want to hear it. ]
it comes in a sharp scrawl: ]
Don't.
[ i don't want to hear it. ]
[It totally is if you're Lilith!] Very well. What would you like to discuss?
Yeah. [ there's a small pause. at least it isn't a compliment. he can deal with that descriptor, at the very least. but it seems almost brushed off. even so. even as the words start to form, again. (even as the fainter scribbling out of some remaining half-thought comes to light.)
but, there's a certain methodical pace to it, almost. thoughtful, it comes through the fainter rounding of shapes and lines: ] If I research things a little, I can usually figure them out. Since this is the Community, it only gives me some information if I dig.
[ another pause. and it comes a little slower: ]
It isn't much, what's on here.
but, there's a certain methodical pace to it, almost. thoughtful, it comes through the fainter rounding of shapes and lines: ] If I research things a little, I can usually figure them out. Since this is the Community, it only gives me some information if I dig.
[ another pause. and it comes a little slower: ]
It isn't much, what's on here.
[she bites back another apology forming on the tip of her tongue.]
... To tolerate the community takes strength. And I think you're stronger than this.
[but she has no right to say that. she hasn't even seen this person's face.]
... To tolerate the community takes strength. And I think you're stronger than this.
[but she has no right to say that. she hasn't even seen this person's face.]
Edited 2012-08-12 08:30 (UTC)
[ there's a longer pause, here. a longer silence. almost as though he is pulling back together. almost as though he is deflecting and guarding. almost as if he is trying again to find that shell of some deeper protection against kindness. a ward.
it would always be easier this way. it would always be so much easier this way. (and he doesn't want to remember. he doesn't want to remember the horrible taste of his own feelings. the bitter sensation fading out like a match light. he doesn't want to recall it, even though he knows it is inevitable. to return. to return in full.)
after a while, his hand moves. after a while, the pen tip scratches out another message. as though he had not heard her. as though excusing himself from what she might think. denying it without words: ]
I never had any interest in staying here.
it would always be easier this way. it would always be so much easier this way. (and he doesn't want to remember. he doesn't want to remember the horrible taste of his own feelings. the bitter sensation fading out like a match light. he doesn't want to recall it, even though he knows it is inevitable. to return. to return in full.)
after a while, his hand moves. after a while, the pen tip scratches out another message. as though he had not heard her. as though excusing himself from what she might think. denying it without words: ]
I never had any interest in staying here.
It's done a good job of keeping itself a mystery this long, it'd be weird if it just gave you the info you wanted easy. [ Yuri sighed. Though he had grown used to this place, he still wasn't sure if liked it or not. At least it kept him from being bored all the time. ]
But people can be disconnected, right? That means there must be some way to get rid of it, if it can leave voluntarily.
Have you tried asking people who know about members that aren't here anymore?
But people can be disconnected, right? That means there must be some way to get rid of it, if it can leave voluntarily.
Have you tried asking people who know about members that aren't here anymore?
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