[video]

[ninjamanager]

[the feed turns on to show Charles standing in a HUGE room somewhere in Mordhaus, stone walls and flying buttresses vaulting up into forever. various crates are stacked around, some ceiling-high, and he's standing next to a massive, burly man dressed like an executioner in a cut-off t-shirt with a clipboard]

... I see. And you found them behind the cases of pickups from EMG? ... Well, they never did sell. My fault, really. The boys hit the big time right near the end of the craze, and it ... died faster than it was projected to.

[he sighs.]

Fantastic. What the hell am I supposed to do with five hundred crates of assorted Dethklok POGs?

Comments

[kittyhell]

I suppose you could make them into something else...bags, wallets, clothing, furniture...wallpaper?

[powerofpink]

[Kendrix cringes]

The fad's worn out by my time too. I think the whole making them into accessories sounds like a good idea. Otherwise, maybe make a game out of it? Put codes on the back that kids have to collect in order to play some kind of videogame?

[ninjamanager]

... Maybe if I had them laminated and turned into keychains ...

[ninjamanager]

... Turn a collectible into a more relevant collectible. I like it. It'd have to be a cheap game, though, to offset the original cost of making the pogs. Maybe an iPhone app ...

[kittyhell]

Or depending on how popular the boys are you could bring POGs back.

[ninjamanager]

They're popular enough to bring anything back. But the problem is marketing them to rebuild the fad around the band.

Not that I can't make it happen. I can make anything happen.

[kittyhell]

You could always have some kind of grand prize in one of the POGs containers as a motivator...you know...one of those "many will enter few will win...but you've got to buy the POGs to get it" deals. If these guys are that popular, you should be able to move these POGs.

[powerofpink]

I think the merchandising itself would help make up for it. I mean, the most popular apps I'm seeing have graphics pretty much out of the late '90s.

[ninjamanager]

Or blister pack them with existing merchandise as a bonus. Make 'em think they're getting something for free.

[he likes the way you think, Selina. he really does]

[ninjamanager]

It's true. Hmm. Not a bad idea. I'll see if our developers can come up with something to make it fly.

.... You, uh. Wouldn't be willing to document that you gave this idea to me willingly, would you? No hard feelings, it's just that, well. Royalties are a pretty big issue over here. And things being how they are, I'd have no way of getting them to you.

[he also does not want you to have them]

[powerofpink]

Absolutely. Besides, I'm more of a researcher anyway. I'm used to handing over my work and letting the head of the department write his name on it.

[ninjamanager]

Excellent. So you're more of an R&D person to start with, anyway. Thank you, Miss, uhh...?

[yes, Charles, please, remember your social manners.]

[kittyhell]

A slight inflation in the price of the merchandise? They'll be none the wiser, that's very good.

[There's an art to ripping people off without making it look like they're being ripped off.]

[powerofpink]

Pretty much. Kendrix Morgan.

[hulloeverything]

[Whoa, hey, the comm popped up as he was TRYING to research something else... oh well. Wait did that guy say POGS? His face cracks into a grin]

POGS? I loved POGS. I have a room dedicated to them in fact. [pause] Or did. I haven't seen it in a while. At least since the last time the old girl regenerated. But I might still have it! Somewhere...

[ninjamanager]

Of course it is. [it's not ego, it's just fact. he's Charles Fucking Ofdensen, he is the best damn manager in the world. it is an uncontested fact]

I take a lot of pride in what I do for these boys. If I'm not doing a good job at it, there's no point.

[ninjamanager]

Charles Foster Ofdensen. A pleasure. ... Are you new to the network?

[ninjamanager]

How do you, ah ... how do you lose a room?

[kittyhell]

So you work with Mr. Explosion then, I take it?

[powerofpink]

I've been here for a little while now, but we haven't run into each other before now, I guess. Plus, I've been cooped up in the lab recently, so I'm catching up now.

[tenminutes]

What the hell are POGs?

[ninjamanager]

I do, yes. I'm his manager. We, ah - we go way back. You've met him over the community, then?

[ninjamanager]

What sort of research do you do, if you don't mind my asking?

[ninjamanager]

They're, ah. [he clears his throat and cracks a crate open. a whole ton spill out]

These. [he picks up a handful and holds them toward the nearest security camera, so she can get a better look over the feed] I can't remember where the hell the name came from, but - they're pieces used in a sort of ... gambling game, I guess you'd call it.

If you're familiar with marbles, that's similar.

[kittyhell]

Heh, he propositioned me, but it didn't go anywhere.

[ninjamanager]

Really. ... Honestly, I'm surprised. Usually where Nathan's concerned, that sort of thing goes everywhere.

[ahem] Groupies. Famous musician. You know.

[kittyhell]

You'd be amazed, my standards tend to be remarkably high. Though Dethklok doesn't exist on my world so it probably helps with the whole star-struck, groupie, fanatic, fan girly thing.

That's not me anyway.

[lil_tanuki]

What are pogs?

[tenminutes]

...It looks like cheap hanafuda.

[powerofpink]

For the most part, different technologies that can help adapt for life on long-term spaceflight, including biology and engineering. We've also started studying a couple of discoveries we've made on different planets.

[hulloeverything]

Quite easily, actually. It's a wonder what one can lose when one has a ship that's bigger on the inside.

[ninjamanager]

I guess this is where I ask you what hanafuda is. I'm a little behind on Japanese culture.

[ninjamanager]

They're collectibles, an old fad that went out of style years ago. People used to play a game with them. Kind of like gambling. Only, all they'd ever really win most of the time were ... each other's pogs.

[yes, he knows they were pretty dumb, but he didn't invent them]

[ninjamanager]

[so the guy does drugs. okay. no big deal. he can be as delusional as he wants, Charles will just sit here and continue to lineface]

I see.

[ninjamanager]

Soooo, ah, space travel is actually a thing where you're from then. That's interesting.

[powerofpink]

We're a little farther behind in a lot of other things, but our space program's doing pretty well.

[lil_tanuki]

Oh I see. That makes sense. Would it be good to have them used as a giveaway maybe?

[tenminutes]

They're a certain type of playing card made for different games. I don't have any on me or I'd show you.

[hulloeverything]

[Fine. DON'T believe him. That only makes him more determined to convince him otherwise. He smirks]

Don't believe me, do you?

[ninjamanager]

Doesn't seem like it would be, no. ... It's a good thing you didn't, anyway. Nathan tends to forget about the paternity waiver.

[ninjamanager]

"A lot of other things", huh? Why so much emphasis on space?

[ninjamanager]

Ah, no.

[so verbose, Charles]

[ninjamanager]

Similar concept, then, yes. Not quite as complicated as cards, though, more like jacks or marbles, from what I understand.

[ninjamanager]

Maybe, but only if we could pass them off as something else. The ship's sailed on them, so to speak.

[lil_tanuki]

What kind of things did you have in mind?

[kittyhell]

Paternity waiver?

[powerofpink]

Well, my world has been invaded by aliens. For the past six years, actually. We just got off a massive invasion. This is part escape and part self-defense. Everybody on staff has been trained for military duties if it comes to it.

[hulloeverything]

[He lifts his wrist and peers at his watch for a moment, thinking]

I've got a few minutes.

[He starts typing commands into the typewriter in the console]

Just give me aaaaaaaa... [It only takes a few more keystrokes to triangulate precisely where in time and space the feed is coming from aaand]

There! [He slams the dematerialization lever home and with a distinctive VWORP the TARDIS surges into motion. The noise is suddenly coming not from the feed - but from Charles' very office as a blue police box slowly materializes]

[tenminutes]

I don't really know much about those.