[accidental audio/video]

[rainin_blk_ppl]

[The feed cuts in on the sound of footsteps.] Nothin' fancy. no heroics. by the book this time.

[A deeper voice replies] You got it. [the sound of something soft being kicked] Hey.

Ooo heeey Jeff, what's happenin', buddy? We was jus' wonderin' what you were doin' here.

Man's talkin' to ya

Uh, you know our arrangements, Jeff. You don't travel outside the E and F and R subway lines and in exchange you get to eat any inorganic garbage that you want

What the hell are you doing here worm boy?

[Jay's sounding pretty concerned, almost frantically apologetic] Uh. T... Jeff. Uh excuse my partner he's new and he's [There's a crash and a man's screams are drawn away from the feed] Kinda stupid. [pause] Wooo you gettin' big, Jeff! Boy what you been eatin'? [There's a THUD and Jay screams before crashing into something. There's some rustling as he pushes back to his feet] Oh you like jokes, huh?

[He warns] Jeffreeeeyyyy. [He grunts as he hops off a height, landing on something moving at a pretty high rate of speed. He grunts as his head collides with something.] Aah! Sweet dreams big boy. [There's a pause before he makes a frustrated noise. He makes another yelp of pain as he accidentally stabs himself with a needle. The noise of a passing subway car can be heard amidst his screaming] Ha ha! Sweet dreeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaa- [His words turn into a scream. The video starts in a subway car as he comes crashing through the back window. He stands up and looks around the car.]

Big boy...

[He adjusts his tie and pulls out an ID card, stepping further into the car] Transit Authority, people. Please move to the forward car, we've got a bug in the electrical system. [The people on the subway car outright ignore him. He gestures, raising his voice to try to get SOME reaction out of these idiots] Yo! People! We got a bug in the electrical system.

[Suddenly, a giant worm with rows upon rows of teeth spiraling around his mouth takes a big bite out of the back of the subway car. Well THAT got their attention. The people in the car start screaming and running towards the forward car. Jay rolls his eyes] Oh now y'all runnin. Nononono sit down! It's only a 600 foot worm!

[Jeff bites off about half of the remaining car]

[The driver of the subway steps out] Everybody out before I start knockin' heads, here.

You get in there and you put the hammer down on that thing. [He points]

I'm captain Larry Bridgewater and I decide what happens on this train.

[Jay's eyes get wide] Oh! YOU decide? oh, okay. C'mere, c'mere. [He drapes his arm around Larry's shoulders, leading him through the crowd just in time to see Jeff take another bite of the car] Larry? That's my man, Jeff.

[Larry's face pales] Larry just made a decision.

Yeah Larry need to take his ass in there. [As Larry goes to speed the car up Jay shoves his way through the passengers to the shredded hole at the back of the car. He draws his gun and aims it down the worm's gullet, shaking his head] Don't make me do this, Jeff! [As Jeff opens his mouth to take another bite the tranquilizer finally takes effect and he falls asleep on the tracks, snoring lightly. Jay slowly lowers his gun. He's relieved he didn't have to kill the worm, but he knew that if it came down to it that's exactly what he would have done. Holstering his weapon he moves to the subway door. The remaining piece of the subway car pulls into the station and the doors slide open. Jay steps out onto the platform.]

81st street. Just a second. [He slips on a pair of sunglasses and pulls a silver device out of his pocket.] May I have your attention, please? [Everyone looks his way as he pushes the button on the device. A blue light flashes in their eyes and they stare blankly at him]

The city of New York would like to thank you for participating in our drill. Had this been an actual emergency y'all woulda been eaten. 'cause ya don't listen. Yer ignorant. How a man gonna come bashin' through the back of a subway window... that's the problem with all y'all New Yorkers. Oh we've seen it all. [His voice raises to a mocking falsetto] Oh no, 600 foot worm, save us Mr. Black Man! [back in his normal register] An I come in, I ask you nice, move to the next car. Y'all just sit there like.... [He sighs, flashing them with the blue light again] thank you for participating in our drill. Hopefully you enjoyed our new smaller more energy efficient subway cars. Watch your step. You will have a nice evening.

[He walks off, idly flashing Larry with the light as he pulls his communicator out of his pocket.]

((OOC: And thus was Jay pushed to the beginning of MIIB anything in bold is anyone other than Jay))

Comments

[wormhole]

So was his name already Jeff or did you name him that?

[rainin_blk_ppl]

[Sigh. Of COURSE the community would see this]

I wasn't here when he got here but that was the name on his passport.

[wormhole]

Does he have a last name? [ beat ] And your partner looks like an idiot, no offense.

[video]

[yumadbro]

...



That was different.

[hippie_hacker]

......


That's new.

[heavenlyhome]

I'm glad that everything worked out all right.

[hasbottombunk]

Um...what was that flashy light thing?

[timey_wimey]

What was that?

[docfoul]

Quite a handy toy you have there.

[antibadstuff]

Giant people-eating slithering thing and you didn't kill it?

[ The last giant thing she saw was a giant evil demon snake hellbent on killing everyone. ]

[rainin_blk_ppl]

Yeah but it's a bitch to pronounce [he chuckles. The laughter fades to a sigh and he runs a hand over his head]

Yeah he is. He ain't gonna be my partner much longer, I'll tell ya that much.

[video]

[rainin_blk_ppl]

Welcome to a day in the life of the Men in Black. We deal with "different" shit every day.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

[he raises an eyebrow]

Yeah not like we gonna put shit like this on the travel brochures.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

[He smirks]

The Neuralizer? Yeah, man, never leave home without it.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

What, Jeff? Psh he a'ite when he's not havin' one've his tantrums. He just mad that I wouldn't just let him do whatever the hell he wanted. Woulda been fine if T hadn't been his usual dumbass self.

And, to be fair, if a dude jumps on yo back an stabs you with a needle wouldn't you be kinda pissed?

[rainin_blk_ppl]

[He smiles]

Hey, it always does when I'm takin' care've things.

[hippie_hacker]

I've seen some weird stuff in my time...but I think that tops things.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

That... is something that y'all shouldn't know 'bout. [pause] But clearly it don't work though the feed so I guess y'all gonna find out anyway.

It's a standard issue Neuralizer. It wipes people's memories so they can just keep goin' on with their happy lives believin' they ain't no aliens on Earth.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

That? Oh that's Jeff. He's a sandworm. He been here so long ain't many still 'round remember what planet he came from.

[rainin_blk_ppl]

Yeah well part of what we do is try to keep it that way. [He waves the Neuralizer before tucking it back into his pocket.

[hippie_hacker]

[He gives a skeptical look back.]

Are you trying to hide them in an attempt to protect creatures like that one?

Or is the government making you hide them so that way they can use them for their own benefits?

[rainin_blk_ppl]

The government? [He laughs] Man the government ain't got nothin' to do with it.

Naw it jus' helps everyone keep on goin' on with they happy little lives. If they knew half the shit that went down in this city alone? [He makes a face]

[hippie_hacker]

That's a good way of handling things. The government in my world just wants to pretend that things like this don't exist and try to cover it up when people do find out.

[docfoul]

I suppose you humans need to make do with what you can.

[heavenlyhome]

I'm sure. It was very odd, in any case. Thank you for protecting those people.