[Audio] TV Killed the Radio Star

[material_guy]

Greed: What's yours is mine and what's mine is mine! This is Greed, 14 years old, at your service!
Al: What do you mean "14 years old" ?
Ed: I really don't get it at all.
Greed: Well, it's fine, whatever. I think only the people who're gonna get it get it.
Ed: Uhm, this is because of the drugs you're on, for that cold, isn't it? You don't have to play the funnyman, okay?
Greed: That sounds good, then let's blame it all on the drugs.
Al: I fully believe it is because of drugs!
Greed: I don't even need to fake it.

Al: And to all our Hagaren fans out there today, please be sure to stick with us for the whole show!
Ed:Yes!


Classy Commercial Greed: It is the sword of the modern day samurai.
The one who conveys such power is none other than the French chef, Michel Au D'or.
For many thousands of years...

Ed: All right! Are you all prepared to do it?
So now, if Greed-kun will please perform his one-man act!
Greed: You didn't say anything about...
No, but I'm...
Ed: Three! Two !One! Now~?


Greed (In Character): Now ain't that one helluva cute puppy we got here! Atta boy, c'mere, c'mere.
Greed (Whiny): My baby puppy... What are you doing to my baby puppy?!
Greed (IC): Oh, good boy, good boy...
Greed (W): Stop! Don't touch him, don't touch him!
Greed (IC): Good, good, GWAAAH!!
The fuck, the little shit pissed on me!
Greed (W): He gets excited easy, so I told you not to touch him...!
Greed (IC): Give me a fucking break!


Greed: I didn't even do anything wrong! Even if you tell me to just do it, it's...


Roze (Narration): Mother, Roa-san's is a warmth that lingers within the heart.
"Roa-san's Wamrth."
Director Iyozu's Cross Country Road Show.
I am so glad that I met Roa-san...

Ed: They were very precise about you, weren't they?
Greed: Huh?
Ed: With establishing your character and all.
Greed: Oh that, yeah, kinda, yeah, they really were, yeah.
Ed: About getting that kind of precision and focus...
Greed: You can tell I'm the type who's prone to research, obviously.
Ed/Al: ........
Greed: So when it came to playing Greed...
I didn't research a thing.
Ed/Al: (Quick burst of laughter.)
Greed: So you know, like.. When I was actually doing it?
I got talked to by the director, right?
He said he was like the Hagaren world's Kiyohara.
All Ore-sama-like and stuff.
All "I'm great, I'm great" and...
More, more like this, be even more cocky, be even more cocky...
I got that a lot.
I mean overall I'm usually more the...Young~ and Good~ type myself, after all.
Ed/Al: ....

Ed: That's right, earlier you said you had a dog!
A: What breed is he?
Greed: His face is very human.

(Dead silence, Dorchette's face flashes in the video, for those who would get the joke and how it leads to Ed's topic lead-in.)

Ed: They used to be in the military, didn't they?
They said they were transmuted into chimeras and so, you took them with their bodies like that and ran away with them... So to that extent your pets are...Your people--your pets, I said, ha--I think they could make at least one CD drama off of the whole group, don't you?
Al: It seems they could, really!
Greed: They really could.
It could be a love comedy.
Ed/Al: ........


Engrish Commercial Greed: Miracle The Pink Time!
LET'S CHECK IT OUT!
Pink Girl A: (Suggestive noise)


Ed: And so it's time to bring our fun times to an end once again! Let's hear it everybody, and a one-two...

Ed/Al/Greed: Goodbye!