[video] You really need to imagine the sappiest music possible here.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

[This is probably an accidental post, considering there's not much going on besides Shelly, sitting comfortably on his sofa, watching some old black-and-white movie. The magic DDD camera then decides it wants to focus on the TV, so you get a close-up shot of said film.

It appears to be some kind of romance: a tall and handsome gentleman dances with a beautiful lady, their bodies pressed together - but not obscenely so, heavens, no - and his hand high on her back, and their faces...

... Suddenly, it turns out the gentleman is Shelly de Killer. As for the beautiful lady, she is none other than Dr. Temperance Brennan.]

"My dear..." [it's the gentleman speaking, and hey, Shelly's mannerisms aren't entirely out of place in a movie like this,] "I have never seen a clavicle as elegant as yours."

[A meow. Wait, a meow? There's no cat in this scene--

But there is one in Shelly's real living room. The man sits stupefied for a moment, and then brings his palm to the front of his face.]

["I'm sorry, boy," says a reassuring voice in his head that echoes in the posted video.]

Comments

[material_guy]

Clavicle. An elegant clavicle.

That's one way to try not to sound like yer staring at her tits. Most girls probably don't know how close to the chest that is.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

... What?

[material_guy]

So that's yer type, huh? Looks a little familiar... She's on here, right?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

...

What?

[material_guy]

Still... you were always classy, but yer kinda romantic too, huh? Unexpected. I pictured you as the more hard-boiled type at the end of the day.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

... What is this video?!

[material_guy]

So, she got a name?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

Stop replying to this post.

[material_guy]

If you don't tell me, that the gay porn chick's gonna think you're tryin' to keep from hurtin' me by tellin' me about yer little side dish. She'll really twist this out of proportion. Best way to clear the air of all that's to just out and admit yer vagnina'd love interest.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

For the love of...

[material_guy]

Right. Finish that sentence. For the love of who?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

For the love of whatever deity you may believe in, forget this post.

[material_guy]

I believe in Eris. She wouldn't want me to just let this drop.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

What does she have to-- oh, yes.

[material_guy]

So? The name? Or should I just wait 'till she sees herself and comments?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

...

Doctor Temperance Brennan.

[material_guy]

Good boy. Was that so hard?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

...

[material_guy]

Now, buck up. I'm on yer side, after all.

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

If you truly wanted to help, then you would have left this post alone.

[material_guy]

What're you saying? You wouldn't have even known about it, then she'd be the first one to comment and you'd get all stupid and stutter and try to just tell her to forget about it! Now we can put together a game plan!

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

Pray tell, what do you have in mind?

[peoplesprincess.livejournal.com]

Dr. Brennan?

[killerbaseball.livejournal.com]

... Hmm.

[material_guy]

Well, first, what kinda gal is she?