[anon, text]

[thatsmyyogurt]

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Comments

[tenminutes]

When did I say that!?

[ WHAT THE HELL KIRITO ]

With Battler! If I did it'd be with Battler and I'm still on the edge of wanting to punch him in the face right now so no one is having sex with me! Ever! Where the hell did you thinking I would do it with you come from!? You're lucky you're stuck in a video game right now or I'd kill you for even suggesting it.

[dual_wield_hax]

It was YOUR wording that tripped me up! Geez seriously!

I know you've got Battler and all but you should at least make up with him.

[tenminutes]

I didn't have any weird wording, your brain jumped weird places!

[ Congratulations, Kirito. You've official become a pervert in her head. She was just joking before, but it's for real now. ]

Battler isn't getting any anyway. Like I said, I'm swearing myself completely off of it. I'll remain a virgin until I get reincarnated and there's nothing any of you perverts can do about it.

[ The point at which Kirito ruins Battler's sex life because Yuri's crazy.. ]

[dual_wield_hax]

It so did not. Well maybe a little but seriously.

Well that's your decision and good on you for that. I'm sure you can have a relationship anyhow without having to do that.

[At which point Kirito becomes the next Yuri Lowell.]

[tenminutes]

I'm becoming a nun.

[dual_wield_hax]

Well if you become a nun then all's well, right?

Seriously, sorry. I just didn't think.

[tenminutes]

I'm demoting Greed from number 1 pervert, you're number 1. At least he doesn't think I'd actually do it with him the second I don't specifically say Battler's name.

[dual_wield_hax]

Oh c'mon! I'm not that bad. Really!

[tenminutes]

You are. You absolutely are. 200%.

[dual_wield_hax]

What would I have to do to make that drop to at least 100%?

[tenminutes]

It won't, it's too late.

[ She's made her decision. ]

[dual_wield_hax]

Fffffff fine fine.

[tenminutes]

It'll go down to 150% if you swear to never, ever turn that option off again.

[dual_wield_hax]

I promise. It's not like I have a use for it save for the taverns. I'll just cut that out of my routine.

[tenminutes]

And don't you ever tell your sister that you turned it off or that it exists, not in a million years.

[ yuri's going to form the protect the imoutos foundation. ]

[dual_wield_hax]

Are you nuts? I wouldn't tell Sugu that there's a function like that.

[She totally should just for the hell of it.]

[tenminutes]

Well you're a pervert so I don't know what you would or wouldn't do.

[dual_wield_hax]

Urgh.

So okay, I promise never to turn this function off or do anything like that.

[tenminutes]

Good, you're only 175% pervert then.

[dual_wield_hax]

You said...! Oh geez Yurippe...

[tenminutes]

I changed my mind. The pervert doesn't get a say in what percent pervert he's declared.

[dual_wield_hax]

... [Sigh] That's just like you.

[tenminutes]

Don't make me reintroduce the points system.

[dual_wield_hax]

Fine fine. [A pause] Points system?

[tenminutes]

Mhm~ You get points for good behavior or being cool or just generally pleasing me. Minus points for stupid comments, perversions, or other arbitrary actions.

[ Basically, whatever she feels like... ]