Bake Sale [video]

[boostup4beetbuster]

Okay, because someone--and by someone, I mean J--not only took home the saddest puppy he could find--and by that, I mean Ren--but ALSO finished off our allowance of enetron after some asshole--and that's Messiah, by the way--stole my entire supply from Hyperspace....I'm holding a bake sale to pay for more.

...Oh, and Makoto says we need meat buns. So we definitely have to pay for that too.

[The camera pans over a plate of blue-tinted blueberry muffins with sad faces made on them in a drizzle of icing.]

We have angstmuffins.

[Now a tray of donuts, with a hand-shaped cookie on top.]

D'oh!nuts, in a vanilla with different icing.

[A rather pathetic-looking apple pie, shaped like a crescent moon.]

What I'm calling the "Derple Pie."

[Some rather sloppy whoopie pies.]

Whoopsie-pies. And pot brownies.

[The camera swings over to some brownies...in pots. With a notecard reading "Note: Do not contain actual drugs--Kurorin would kill me, and I'm in enough trouble as it is."]

So, any takers?

Comments

[bookishnettler]

What sort of money could I pay in? A friend of mine is in the hospital wing, and it would be lovely to get him something.

[boostup4beetbuster]

International currency's fine. I can get that changed somewhere.

[bookishnettler]

I don't think I have any British pounds right now... only wizard money. I don't suppose you can use that?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Well, it could be a chance to check with that Japanese wizard who supposedly looks like me. You've got a deal!

[bookishnettler]

You know a wizard?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Not really. But I've got a friend...who has a friend. Who has a friend who's the guy's brother.

[bookishnettler]

Where is he from?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Japan, and the same world as me. It's all kinda weird, and coming from me, that's saying something.

[pintsizedpyro]

...Humans eat the strangest crap sometimes, I swear.

[boostup4beetbuster]

But we make it awesome.

[dealwithadeva]

More like freakin' ridiculous, I mean, I don't even know what's going on with some a' this stuff!

...Guess it doesn't look that bad, though. Least it's edible and that's more than I can say of some of the stuff in this world.

[boostup4beetbuster]

Okay, I can give you a free sample if you want to try it. Just one, though.

[pintsizedpyro]

...Seriously?

[Wait, no, that sounded too enthusiastic. He's too tsun for this, fuck.]

I mean. Uh. I guess if you wanna give me one for free it's not like I can really stop you!

[boostup4beetbuster]

Sure. Try this.

[He sends over the pie. It may look like a disaster, but it's really quite good.]

[pintsizedpyro]

[And he does eat it.]

...Huh. [And... yeah, crap, that's actually good. If there's one thing he misses about the real world, it's the food. There's no convenience stores to steal from in the digital world...] Not bad. Who woulda thought?

[boostup4beetbuster]

I'm not that bad in the kitchen, am I?

[pintsizedpyro]

Guess not. Not that I'm the best person to be judging that, seeing as I don't know shit about how you even make this kinda stuff.

[boostup4beetbuster]

But I got a satisfied customer anyway.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Can't we just steal it back?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Gonna be tough if the supply's already in Hyperspace. I hate saying it, but it looks like it's getting close to time to take the battle to Messiah.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Are you scared we're not gonna win?

[boostup4beetbuster]

More like I'm not sure how ready the others are. It's gonna be rough for them.

[yes_im_kawaii]

It went badly enough already, though! Right? And you guys are prepared!

[boostup4beetbuster]

Yep. We're just gonna have to blow the whole thing sky high!

[yes_im_kawaii]

Like with bombs?

[boostup4beetbuster]

And lasers. And giant robots.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Okay.

I don't want you guys to go away.

[boostup4beetbuster]

It won't be a long mission. Promise.

[Still, it's like he's not telling something...]

[yes_im_kawaii]

Are you sure?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Yep, we'll be back before you know it. And without Messiah around to rain on the parade, it'll be loads more fun.

[yes_im_kawaii]

...I have a feeling someone's told me that before.

[boostup4beetbuster]

...Did it involve me promising to do everything I can to drive Ryuji nuts?

[yes_im_kawaii]

*blink* No? You do that anyway. Auuu, I don't remember!

[boostup4beetbuster]

Then it's probably not a big deal, right? Now let's figure out what's the best way to make Ryuji so mad he has to dunk his head in cold water so he doesn't overheat.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Dye his clothes purple?

[boostup4beetbuster]

With big, sparkly Gorisaki faces on them--that's genius!

[yes_im_kawaii]

I'm getting the glitter glue!

[boostup4beetbuster]

I'll photocopy Gorisaki's face!

[yes_im_kawaii]

Fabric paint or those iron-on thingies?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Iron-on's easier, and then we can use the paint over it anyway.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Okay! So can we go to the craft store?

[boostup4beetbuster]

Yes, we're gonna need a lot of glitter.

[yes_im_kawaii]

Okay! Then it'll be a lot less boring.