Watched

[mariannethree]

Order: 1104
Chaos: 45

Little book, people often use you to ask for help, correct?

I need some advice. In my land - my 'world' as you would call it - I live in a library.

At night, if I leave the lights on, people come and bang on the windows of the room I sleep in, yelling at me to give them books. When I turn the lights off they disappear, but they come back if I have to turn the light back on for any reason.

Do you have any advice on how I could get them to stop? Its frightening to have people look at me like that. It makes me feel ugly and dissected, and knowing that they're never really gone, only dissuaded for a while, is making it difficult to sleep.

Thank you for any advice you care to give.

Marianne Z.
Under Assistant
The Library

Comments

[tenminutes]

One of a lot of things I've learned in my posthumous existence is that hiding the truth so you don't get hurt only ends up in more pain than the first thing. Would you rather suffer every single night like this or spend one day of someone bitching at you over a broken window?

[mariannethree]

But the broken window could let them in. Having them walled away at least keeps me protected. What if they don't listen to me, or take what they want by force? What if the glass is all that's protecting me, and breaking it would give them the access they need to destroy me?

[tenminutes]

You're kind of a scaredy cat aren't you?

[mariannethree]

Being cautious is sensible. Taking chances is the same as asking for it. I'd rather protect myself than risk having the world turn against me.

[tenminutes]

Sleeping in a library is sensible to begin with?

1/2

[mariannethree]

...

[Well...there is that. Its scary and lonely in the library, and she hates having to hide the fact that she can't escape. But Marianne isn't quite up to admitting that to herself yet.]

2/2

[mariannethree]

It is where I am meant to be. To wish for something more would be to tempt fate to take what little I have from me.

[tenminutes]

Take it from a dead girl, if you're not living the way that you want to while you're alive then you're going to regret it when you're not no matter what age you are.

[mariannethree]

I know what happens to both the dead and living in dreamworlds. They fade into oblivion, their essence slipping away from them. I probably won't die, at least in the way you are familiar with.

[tenminutes]

It sounds like you're just fading into oblivion by not doing anything but sitting in the library anyway.

[mariannethree]

Better to fade away than be ripped to shreds by the monsters that lurk outside.

[tenminutes]

Want me to teach you how to fight?

[mariannethree]

I don't think it would work very well. Destruction is dangerous.

[tenminutes]

So are angry mobs outside of a library.

[mariannethree]

...true. But I've never fought before. It seems frightening.

[tenminutes]

If you're alive, it generally is. If it's not you're not doing it right. When you fight though, what you've got to do is get to a level where you know that you're going to win, so you've got something to combat and soothe that fear with.

[mariannethree]

But I've never won before. Its just an excuse for him to take more things away from me.

[She doesn't notice she wrote 'him' instead of 'them']

[tenminutes]

That's why you practice and catch whoever he is by surprise.

[ Yuri did, but she won't dig into it if Marianne doesn't go into it herself. ]

[mariannethree]

You think I haven't tried? These feelings are based on more than emotion, but on experience...even if I cannot remember the exact circumstances.

[tenminutes]

Hmm.. Can people worldhop over there? I'm sure I'm not the only one willing to help.

[mariannethree]

...I don't know. Somehow I doubt it. I have never been affected by any of the community "viruses", nor have I been removed from my land by anything the community has done.

[mariannethree]

Its never happened yet. Why would that change now?

[If Marianne seems beaten down and defeatist...well, she is. Her half-remembered monster of a brother has done quite a lot to ensure that's the case.]

[tenminutes]

Want me to try then?

[mariannethree]

No! Thank you, but no. You are...rather young in appearance and I would not wish you to be damaged.

[tenminutes]

I'm dead already, it's not like I can die again.