dramadramaduck | 1.0; Reboot: Kefka 2, Electric Boogaloo

Current Location: Tower of Kefka

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1.0; Reboot: Kefka 2, Electric Boogaloo

I am going to die of boredom if this keeps up!

[Here is a little pale man sitting on a ledge of rock. Only a few smudges of light make it through the clouds to show off the scarlet paint on his face and fill the hollow cheek bones.]

[He picks up a rock and throws it into the dark abyss below.]

How am I supposed to have any fun if nothing's on the line? A video game is nothing like real life. Game over; new game; continue. How can anything be fun if no precious lives are on the line? Now that I know the true nature of things, what's the point in continuing this farce of final boss?

[Kefka hops to his feet and starts yelling at the abyss.]

If they don't come back, I'll - I'll play loud music in the middle of the night. I'll kill someone and dance on his grave. I won't mix patterns for a week! I won't wear any bright colors! I'll destroy this universe and everyone in it, then hop to another and blast Never Going to Give You Up from the loudspeakers for hours at a time! So help me, if the ducks don't come back, I'll -

[A worldhop device falls out of the sky and whaps Kefka on the head. Kefka squawks, almost wobbles off the ledge, then tumbles onto his butt, off the ledge and onto the rocky ground.]

Yeouuuuch! What nasty creature dares hit Kefka on the head?!

[He looks up into the camera, then grins.] Ducks! You're back!

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[A kindred spirit! ~~and now, Fridge Horror strikes~~ Stanley nods.]

Sometimes, you just need to start over, and the chance to do it! Besides, it's not like you have to be stuck on one world now, right? You don't have to be here if you don't want to.

[Unfortunately, they don't make many self-help books for that sort of thing. ;)]

[How much of the World of Ruin was the Triad blowing up, and how much of it was Kefka trying to make his ideal world?]

This world does need me to keep functioning, though. I keep the magic running on my world; magic fuels a lot of things here. If I left and died and everything here broke, that'd be pretty anti-climactic, wouldn't it? I go through all that trouble to get the magic and then don't do anything interesting with it. I'm not satisfied.

What do you think of me retiring? I could go do something I really like doing, and someone else gets to be god of this world.

[Nope ;D They've been absolutely useless so far!]

[An entire ~~Xbox~~ continent smashed into the planet. Blame is a little hard to assign here.]

Huh, that's a lot of responsibility for one person, and someone not liked at that! [Stanley doesn't even think about how all this came to be. Hey, it's just him.

Stanley mulls over Kefka's question, and something he thought about for a while immediately comes to mind. It's a good a time as ever, he decides!]

How would you feel about being able to use a Green Thumb, like me? With it, you could do lots of interesting things, and things you'd really like doing!

[Figures.]

[The only thing I'm sure of is that he put Celes on the island with really weak monsters. THAT IS THE ONLY THING MY HEADCANON HAS DECIDED]

It was fun at first, but now it's not. [Kefka tilts his head.] Is that your planty power?

[two things wrong with that: there are zombifying bone dragons in the desert, and the other critters should've died out a long time ago.]

Uh huh! [It's another nod!]

[well, it's not a perfect system |D and why aren't all those monsters all dead already? since they seem to waste away in a battle...]

I'm interested. It's been some time since I've cultivated plants on my own. I used to have a little garden, but between all my traveling and how much work they can be, it's been years.

[They are only good for Stealing from and uncursing a certain shield.]

Okay then!

[Snap! The Thumb hums and starts glowing.]

If my hunch is right, you only need to snap your fingers like I just did, and really want your thumb to turn green. I know we already spent a lot of time together! And you can have all the gardens you want, too.

[THE MOMENT OF TRUTH?]

Hmm. I guess I'll try it.

[Kefka crosses his legs, closes his eyes and concentrates. He wants plants. Flowers. ]

[Pink poppies, yellow bell flowers with black berries, white bell flowers with spiky seed pods, tall bushes with bursts of many tiny blossoms grouped together between fern-like leaves, and drooping purple blossoms appear around Kefka.]

[He opens his eyes and looks around.] Oh! A veritable garden! [oh wait hold on - ] Don't eat the berries.

Edited 2014-03-15 03:28 (UTC)

[Incredible joy paints Stanley's face as Kefka uses the thumb for the first time! Now he knows that Gus wasn't a fluke.]

I knew it! It just grew on you!

[Stanley laughs, both from his bad pun and from excitement.]

(OOC: Retcon that Kefka snapped his thumb and it turned green and humming?)

[ooc: yes! that is what happened.]

Yes! Let's make another one!

[Snap! Pink flowers with square petals. Snap! Pink bell flowers! Snap! A small tree with red flowers!]

Such beautiful seedlings!

Edited 2014-03-15 04:01 (UTC)

[Those plants look a lot like the ones Greed had Stanley grow a long while ago.* But never mind that, there are more ~~powers to abuse~~ mighty Thumbs to invoke!]

Yes they are!

(OOC: *Greed-mun, if you're reading this, your drug plot is neglected!)

[Kefka snaps his fingers one more time, and one more bush grows, starting with small white flowers that bloom, then ripen into - ]

[Tomatoes.]

These ones are good for eating, unlike the other berries I made! Those are used for medicine, but before you turn them into medicine they can make you sick. These ones, though, are delicious. [Kefka plucks a tomato.] They're from the same family of plant!

[Stanley can't speak right now, as his mouth is full of tomato.

It sure is nice to be appreciated sometimes, hm?]

(OOC: Green Thumb primer, for reference purposes.)

The nightshade family is a very big family of plants, though. It has a lot of different kinds of flowers! They also make some foods, like chili peppers and potatoes. [om nom nom tomato]

I wonder. Could I make up a plant that is both potato and tomato? Or can I only make plants that exist in reality?

You can create entirely new kinds of plant if you'd like.

[For example, Stanley will grow what looks like a miniature gazebo made of plant matter.]

[Kefka snaps his fingers. A tree shoots up; flowers blossom, fall, then ripen into chili peppers. Kefka plucks one and bites into it.]

Yessss, the hot peppers. I could make a plant spicier than any pepper that has ever lived!

You could make cold peppers too!

[...he doesn't have much experience thinking outside the box.]

No, no, not like hot on fire. Like hot spicy.

Oh!

[Pause]

I hope you don't feed someone a tomato that is really, really, spicy. That would be a surprise!

[Stop giving him ideas, you who doesn't have much imagination.

Yes, this mun is aware of the irony.]

That would be terrible, wouldn't it? Especially since lots of spicy stuff can make you sick...

[Now that is an idea. Plants that look like one thing but are another. Plants spliced together. PLANTS!]

[But that's not much of a challenge, is it?]

I wonder if I could make a plant that would ferment on it's own...

You probably could! Go ahead and try it.

[Kefka's going to be Greed's rival at this rate.]

[Snap!]

[A tree pops up, grows, blooms, and apples appear, then shrivel and fall off the tree.]

....Ok, that was not what I had in mind.

Maybe have another plant do the fermenting?

[He's taking shots in the dark here.]

Maybe. Grapes do it, I think. But having the fruit ferment isn't quite the same as having the juice ferment into wine...

[...does stanley know what booze is?]

[Not really! He's just trying to be helpful.]

I mean, having another plant help you out!

[Stanley applies his Thumb, and what looks like a stretchy vine wiggles over to the failapple tree and starts to pick up the shriveled apples.]

You could say it's Magic. :p

do you believe in magic in a young troll's heart?

when the statues got moved, right from the start?

...i dont' know the next line

don't worry, it's magic!

dance magic dance?

NO TIME LIMIT!

instead i will muck around on wikipedia :9

Congrats, Stanley. You just derailed one of the best games of all time!

it may take time to take effect, but the derailing has begun~

just like the toxins in those plants. Only, it's not necessarily bad(?)

Yes! And some of these 'poisonous' plants are also used as medication! sometimes toxins are good (?)

Man, morality is grey sometimes. (!)

And plants are AWESOME.

Use this power wisely. ;)

get me off wikipedia, there's too many cool plants!

Not even a new thread and already the Thumb is giving Kefka more than he bargained for.

i could use this for murder WAIT HOLD ON I CAN MAKE FOOD WITH THIS

Wonderful edibles, like Megalixir corn!

or remedy flowers!

Or Holy Water pink cauliflower!

NEON BLUE APPLES

Tofu that actually tastes good!

THAT IS TRULY A FANTASTICAL BEAST

We can do it! We have the sufficiently advanced magic!