Hello.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Good morning. I am Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing, director of Hellsing. My organisation specializes in the removal of Freaks and vampires, so please feel free to contact us if you have any such problems.

Although... seeing as most of you seem to think that you're from different 'worlds', then that might be a problem.

Edit: When I said 'Freaks', I meant artificial vampires. Thank you.

Comments

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Just because someone is back from the dead, however unlikely that sounds, does not give me a reason to kill them. If they start biting people in the neck and drinking their blood, then I would consider going after them.

A pleasure to meet you.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

Um. When you say biting people and drinking their blood, does it count if you're eating them? Like properly? Not just the blood?

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Normally, I wouldn't. But since you mentioned it... Dare I ask where you're from?

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

I don't know if I want to tell you, you might hunt me down and kill me. I don't want to die again.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

It seems that a few people are on this LiveJournal community are already dead, but have returned to life, so to speak.

And I think that hunting you down is the point. But if you are not in the United Kingdom, I suppose I can hardly count you as a threat to the country; you won't be pursued in that case.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

I'm not in the UK~ Thank hell. ^^ Please don't hunt me down, I'm a nice guy! Just an occasionally hungry one. I mostly stick to rice and fish nowadays anyway.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Thank Hell? I've never heard of anyone who's used that expression before.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

Why would I say thank Heaven? Fuckers want to kill me! This shitty group of angels already did once, but they were...dealt with.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Interesting! I am beginning to be convinced of Demyx's words; everyone has their own consistent story to tell.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

Yeah, speaking of which, do you get demons and angels round your way? Or just vampires and freaks? 'Cause I'm still trying to find Ororon, King of Demons.

(And I really wouldn't try going after him, trying to exterminate him or whatever, because he can take anything.)

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

I have met neither an angel nor a demon; I reckon it would be a unique experience. But to answer your question, Hellsing deals only with vampires and their extermination should they pose a threat to the people of England.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

Yeah, unique and most likely painful. I advise you stay well, well away. Not being threatening, just trying to give some advice. Well, if Ororon shows up in England (although I have no idea why) please tell him I'm looking for him and then run the hell away.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

I will, if I see him. That is, if I know how he looks like.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

He's tall, thin, looks a real ladykiller. Has three dots under his left eye. Probably be in a suit, or something equally swish.

[shinra-pwnsjoo.livejournal.com]

Well - can someone be an undead; not suck blood, yet at the same time destroy more?

Finally, a sensible woman. I look foward to your future posts. And stay away from Kadaj. He'll start talking about how I shot his mother ... who's not really his mother ... and how he wants to do her.

... Does incest count as a reason to kill him even if he's not a vampire?

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

YOU. BEEF WITH YOU. What in the fuck is going on with you and Kadaj!?

[shinra-pwnsjoo.livejournal.com]

My name is not YOU. BEEF WITH YOU. I don't like beef; it gets caught in my teeth and it's disgusting.

What's going on with Kadaj and I? Well, he shows up in my office saying something about the JENOVA project and then tortures my men (... and woman) and then destroys MY city AGAIN.

... Plus I get really, really BORED.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

I was more referring to the fact you shot his mother in the head, you prick.

[shinra-pwnsjoo.livejournal.com]

Oh. that. Her head was in a box that his 'brother' ripped off her body. His fault not mine.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

...her head was in a...wait, what? Jesus fucking christ, what the hell's going on here? ...his brother killed her?

[shinra-pwnsjoo.livejournal.com]

Yeah. This guy named Sephiroth found out he was just a clone or something because one of my father's scientists injected herself with JENOVA cells (Kadaj's 'mother') and then he jumped off the deep end and 'liberates her' by ... pulling her head off.

[ninelivesbaby.livejournal.com]

...I think I need to go have a chat with Kadaj.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

Yes. I suppose so. But it is not my duty to pursue such individuals unless they bring harm to my country.

I was not aware that Kadaj had such an... interesting past. However, shooting his mother- even his foster mother- is not exactly a pardonable act itself.

I'm afraid not.

[shinra-pwnsjoo.livejournal.com]

JENOVA? A Calamity that fell from the sky?

And she's not his mother. :|

Damn.

[forthequeen.livejournal.com]

You would think that such an event would be known throughout the world, but no, I have not heard of JENOVA prior to joining this LiveJournal community.

She was still someone closely related to him, yes?