[Video - forward-dated to tomorrow afternoon]

[archangelofderp]

Ladies and gentlemen!

[What is Michael wearing... Evidently he thought the occasion was enough for him to get dressed up like a rock star. He smiles into the video camera, and adjusts it a little to look out over a large stage.]

Today certain contestants have been preparing and the time is here~ In a moment I'll start recording each of their entrances. When I am finished, you viewers at home will receive, hm, let's say one vote to give to the best competitors!

Remember, the prizes go to charity, and it's all in good fun. Please enjoy everyone's hard work!

[Each competitor will have their own thread in which to post their outfit and entrance and where everyone can mock them. There'll be another thread for voting after that!

This is going up a little early so the competitors have time to see it and get their threads going.]

Comments

[material_guy]

[It's Greed. Just the plain old every day Greed, plus a humongous rack, which he will continually be adjusting shamelessly throughout the event as much because they need it or are falling out as because the squeaky noise and the building static electricity that reacts with his shirt amuses him probably about as much as getting real breasts for a day would, but otherwise he's in his usual getup. As for making an entrance, he only walks down normally, strips off his vest to throw into the audience, holds up a finger, then points said finger to the audience announcing:] Now buy me drinks if you're gonna stare and grab at my tits all night!

[And with that announcement made, he's off to wait for those drinks.]

[glimmerous_fop]

[So here he is, the only person in the world who would buy Greed a drink after that performance. Klavier was amused, disturbed, and disappointed all at once...though more amused and disturbed...because there was a very loud voice inside of him that had been insisting all along that Greed would never put on a dress or makeup.

The only true thing here was the staring, Klavier was staring...because...balloons. Really? Klavier made an effort to look surprisingly realistic, in fact if he wasn't a guy it would be difficult to tell if his chest really belonged to a woman or not...but...balloons.] Luftballons, Herr? You think if you build up enough static you'll stick to the wall.

[material_guy]

[Well, there's not necessarily a live audience so much as Michael taking pictures and projecting them to the internet as it is, so admittedly his drink buyers are bound to be limited. But there's something to be said for showmanship, even Greed's terrible brand of it. He won't take it personally if not too many people are buying him drinks; he'll blame the setting.]


Nah, they're just regular balloons. [A Luftballoon must be a special balloon, perhaps specifically for boob enhancement purposes. Germans, Californians, or whatever group is responsible for Klavier's weirdness probably would have a word for such a thing.] Wanna feel?

[glimmerous_fop]

Luftballons is air balloon, Herr, you've never heard the song? Hast du etwas Zeit fur mich Dann singe ich ein Leid fur dich Von 99 Luftballons... [Did he expect Greed to get any of what he was singing? Nope, but he only sung the one line, it was a very popular song, even Klavier knew about it and he was born long after the release.

What was weird was the fact that Greed was asking him to touch his balloons...it was just...bizarre. Of course who was weird, the one asking or the one touching. Actually Klavier just poked in order to confirm that they were indeed what they were.] One false move and they'll pop...the technology needs some growth in your world. I was able to get some...

[material_guy]

[It's a very... disturbing experience, if he had to pick only one adjective, hearing Klavier's singing voice in that body. Greed's been spoiled. Almost all of his experiences with Klavier with boobs and a skirt have been with a virally female one. Even if he's tried to hide his build, at least in Greed's eyes, he has a manface, a man's frame under all that layering and booting and boobing. Or at least he has a face and identity Greed too strongly associates with a man to see otherwise.

That drink can't come fast enough.]

S'all right. If you pop one, I already know how you can make it up tome.

[glimmerous_fop]

[It can't be helped, this was a cross-dressing thing, he wasn't about to change the pitch of his voice even though he could change his appearances to some extent. A beautiful man could only give the illusion of a decent woman, but an illusion was all that it was...he only had to look convincing.]

Yeah? How should I make it up to you?

[material_guy]

[Greed starts digging in his pocket for a moment before pulling out another, uninflated, balloon.]

Blow me.

[trustmybase]

[It gives her a good laugh. If nothing else, he's amusing.] Woo-hoo. I almost didn't know the difference. I had to remind myself that they're fake.

[material_guy]

They got nipples 'n all. [He pulls at the tied-off ends of the balloons proudly.] Greed goes all out, baby.

[trustmybase]

You went too small. Couldn't you find bigger balloons?

[material_guy]

The shirt only stretches so far.

[trustmybase]

No excuses. You could have gotten a different shirt.

[material_guy]

This style's not easy to find. And I got at least one vote so far on pure style.

[glass_secret]

[No actual response. Cindy is just laughing her ass off.]

[material_guy]

So I can count on yer vote?

[glass_secret]

Sorry sweetie, you have to put in more effort then just shoving balloons in your shirt to get my vote.

[material_guy]

My outfit'd look hot on a girl.

[glass_secret]

Perhaps, but still need more effort. I can still tell you're a guy.

[material_guy]

Always knew my outstanding manliness'd be my downfall one day.

[tenminutes]

You've got my vote.

[ Yuri thinks this whole thing is ridiculous anyway. ]

[material_guy]

Knew you liked my style.

[tenminutes]

More like I'd rather laugh than care if a guy is masculine or feminine like it matters.

[material_guy]

You got a better pageant idea?

[tenminutes]

Maybe some kind of pageant where the contestants have to look their best while walking a tight rope over a pool of sharks with laser beams attached to their forehead or something..

[material_guy]

Sharks with laser beams?