[text]

[otaku_badass]

Okay first my TV showed a duck and wouldn't go away so I unplugged it, next my cell phone wouldn't work due to the same duck showing on its screen so I had to turn it off, then I went outside and found that you asses posted a duck on any flat surface you could find, now I'm back on my phone and I want to know some things.

First: What is your fucking problem?
Second: How the hell are you doing this?

Comments

[not_that_lockon]

Magic. We're the next frontier in the long and illustrious line of internet trolls.

Alternatively, welcome to Dramadramaduck, the only interdimensional internet community whose software actively tries to stalk every detail of your life.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Well color me fucking shocked! Why would this "interdenominational internet community" give two shits about me, are you my fans or something?

[not_that_lockon]

Nope, never heard of you in my life, sorry. If you ever figure out why it cares about any of us in the first place though, tell me, 'cause I've been trying to figure that one out for the past three years.

[selfished]

Magic! [ not really, but hey, might as well take the opportunity to troll and maybe get something out of it.. ]

I'll make them go away if you feed me.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Fair enough.

....................../´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\...

Full enough now?

[selfished]

That doesn't even look like food, at least give it some effort that isn't lame!

[glass_secret]

Oh you're definitely new here. I'm thirding the whole magic thing. It's the best explanation I've seen so far.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Magic, well I supposed given the circumstances, so why me?

[text]

[glass_secret]

You're just one of the many special snowflakes that get randomly pulled into this pain in the ass community, sweetie.

[glimmerous_fop]

Not the twin I was hoping for, but welcome back to the nexus anyway Herr Touchdown.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

What the... "Welcome back?" What?

[glimmerous_fop]

You've been here before...or at least some form of you...at one point. Might have been from a different time period or this might just be a reboot of you from the same time period and you don't remember. That's just part of what this place does.

[voice]

[blahblahblah]

So you've made it onto the most annoying place in the multiverse. Congratulations, and welcome to hell.

I've found that the only reliable way to get this place to leave you alone is to use it - what you're doing now, basically.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

So this "thing" is stalking me only to get me to write something on it?

Re: [text]

[blahblahblah]

No. It's stalking you because it finds you interesting. Your job now is to entertain it by using it to talk to us.

Honestly, at the end of the day it's not all bad. You get to meet people you'd never have met, see things you'd never see. If it weren't so invasive it might actually be fun.

handwritten;

[moonspell]

I wouldn't really call it magic, it's just something no one really knows much about... I mean, it could be, but there are a lot of weird things that happen...

I don't really think anyone here has a problem with you though, sir.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Well if that's the case have it stop pestering me.

[hunterofpeace]

Advertising is always persistent.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

I'm guessing it's also bugging you?

[aquaticrush]

Ah, you're back! I'm really sorry for the trouble this place will give you.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Back? This is the fist time I've ever been here!

[a_new_innovator]

It sounds like the community is trying to make sure you use it. It can get rather persistent.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Based on everyone's response that seems to be the case. Anyways, Travis Touchdown.

[video]

[king_bowser]

[On video, Bowser scrolls through and reads many of the previous posts, then laughs rather uproariously at the ASCII middle finger after staring blankly at it for about half a minute.]

Yeah, you can't even wish yourself out of here. But why would you wanna? Once you get used to this place and all the... uh... people... on it, it's pretty cool.

[text]

[otaku_badass]

Is that a giant talking lizard? Holy shit that's actually impressive!