えゔえん いf tへ symぼls あれ いん じゃぱねせ、 い しょうld stいll べ あblえ と-- おh、 へll。
おk、 まyべ のt。 lえt's try sぺあきんg と tへ だmん tひんg tへん。

[voice]

...wherever the hell I am, it sure was considerate of someone to leave a computer for me. Even if I can't type on the goddamn thing.

I guess I'm in Japan? Just a wild, wild guess. On account of the keyboard. And everything outside, when I stuck my head out the window.

I mean, I think it's Japan. I... I don't know what I'm doing here, though. Unless this is supposed to be Hell? If Hell looks like Japan, then I guess I've done okay - there's a lot less fire and brimstone than I was expecting, that's for sure.

Even if it is smoky outside. I guess someone's having a bonfire. Or a barbecue. I don't know.

[after rambling at length, she sighs. it's a big, deep sigh.]

I'm alive, then? I want to say all of what happened was a dream, but...

It wasn't, was it?

Is there anyone even listening to me? I kind of looked at the place where all my imaginary friends were, but none of you were making any sense. Either you've all gone crazy, or I have. Or I'm more crazy.

Maybe I'm dreaming again now, and everything's still happening.

I remember, though. I remember him killing me.

So why am I here? Wherever here is.

[there's silence for a while, and then]

...shit.

[click]

You still there, all my little friends?

( cut for... audible gore?? )

[Those of you who have spoken to Kirei in person before may have noted that he sounds very flat and monotone.

Well.

He doesn't now.]

If a superior made a mistake, would it be your duty to correct them? Or would you let them flounder in their own errors? I suppose it would depend on how severe the error is, if nothing else. Some mistakes are just small missteps in judgment, after all. It's almost impossible to know everything all at once.

But there are some mistakes that can only be made once. Ones so large that they can't be taken back. You become stuck upon a path, winding outward from the consequences of your actions. Inevitably, those consequences must come back to us.

If the person above you made a mistake of that magnitude...

Well.

Would you be one of those consequences?

[Casually, in the background:]

It appears that Kotomine Kirei is rather long-winded, today.


(OOC: gold = gilgamesh. Also, people trying to worldhop into fate/zero verse will now find it worldlocked! nobody's coming in or out. We runnin' this!)

So, I got a question for you people. Say there's this big threat that's going to happen to your world. Like end of the world type bad.

Would you try to stick around to solve it or pack up who you love and jump ship to another world?

If I may ask, what are the methods of healing like in your world?

Dear Community,

I need your help.

I happen to be part of a friendly neighborhood crime syndicate. My sister is a cop and she is dating. However, thanks to my criminal connections, I know the man she is interested in happens to have his dead girlfriend taxidermied in his basement. (No, I don't know how she died. I'm pretty sure the fact that she's taxidermied in his basement is warning sign enough.)

How do I go about getting her to realize that he is not a good match for her without getting stabbed?

From, Worried Brother

[[All tags will be anon unless otherwise stated!]]

What do you do when you find out your friend has been lying to you about something the whole time you've known them? Lying about something big.

[shinji breathes into the microphone, static erupting through the speakers in short bursts.  he sounds as if he's been pushed past the verge of tears and onto the brink of absolute panic, but he has to do this.  he has to.]

Kaworu-kun...he's gone.  It was strange that he was gone so early this morning, but I didn't think about it.  Now it's been hours and he's not back.  I called his job and his phone.  They haven't seen him and he won't answer.  All his things are here.  Even his violin is here.  He'd never leave without it.  I can't find him.  He disappeared.  Kaworu left.

[an audible gulp, a shaky sigh.] And I can't find him at all.  Tell me you've heard from him.

Please.

[The camera picks up a deep red couch and stone for a moment. The couch is empty. For the moment. Someone walks in. Heavy footsteps. Sits down in front of the laptop. Dull eyed and empty. Wearing a priest's outfit. He peers into the laptop for a few moments. Not particularly long, but not a quick glance. He seems to be clicking something, or else checking it.

Ah. He's got it now. He shifts his gaze from the keyboard up to the red blinking camera light.]

I'll be right back.

[Voomp. The video closes. Not suspiciously quickly. Don't get any ideas. Just a hanging moment, as he finds the right key, and x's it out.

A few moments later, this text appears.]

Now then. What can you tell me?

(OOC: Two things!
1. if you haven't hit up Kirei's permission post, you might wanna do that!
2. This is a double intro! R's Gilgamesh (effulge) will be hopping around at will! You should fill out his permissions, too!)